When a New Year rolls in, you get that shiver up your spine. It doesn’t matter where you are in your life, you have just turned the page of your story to a fresh, clean sheet. You get to scribble all over this sheet in any way that you see fit, and the best part of it all is that you will be able to leave behind the things that didn’t allow you to be happy. 2018 has been a packed year, and when you spend time looking back on all the things that you’ve done well throughout the months, you may well be ready to shut the book on 2018 and look ahead.
How much did you do for yourself? Think about when did you put yourself first – without guilt? How many times did you decide to do something purely because it made you happy? If you’re shaking your head right now, the biggest change that you need to make in 2019 is this: you need to make it your year. Your year to feel a little bit…selfish. Not in the bad way – selfish in the good way; in the most wonderful way. In the way that makes you smile, because today you chose to put your own well being first. In the way that you laugh because you chose to take a step toward the future doing something that you have always wanted to do.
Perhaps you’ve put off getting that degree because you panicked that you’d interfere in time with your friends and family. Perhaps you’ve put off interviewing for jobs that you actually want, because you’re afraid of being told ‘no’. It’s time to put fears aside and stand in front of the potential storms, and instead of getting soaked with rain, you’re standing in the warmth of sunlight – a light you didn’t even know was there.
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The best thing about choosing yourself – not every time, but sometimes – is that you connect with your inner self. You become stronger. If you’ve been struggling and turning to drugs or other vices to get through the day,it means that you need a little help. What better way to start a fresh New Year, than by choosing the intensive outpatient treatment instead of the basic counseling you’ve been getting so far?
A big part of choosing yourself means learning to step back and say no to other people. When you have a lot of people leaning on you, you are always lauded as the best friend, the best listener and the best support. And yet, it’s far easier to crumble when you have the weight of everyone else’s issues on your shoulder. Take the time to lean back on occasion, ask for help for yourself and generally feel like you need to stop feeling crushed.
Making 2019 yours is going to be about taking action in your life. Moving forward away from the negativity and toward positivity. You do not need to take anything that you don’t want to. If people in your family are making you feel low, depressed and worthless, they do not deserve a place in your life going forward – family or not. Your friends should be helping to support you, too. If you have realized that the company you keep isn’t supportive or good to you, then 2019 is your year to walk away and stand on your own two feet. You are not obliged to deal with any person who doesn’t treat you as an equal.
When you decide to set yourself some goals, you need to not only be clear with those around you, but clear with yourself on what you want. You should be making your goal decisions based on your future, and not anyone else’s idea of what you should be doing.
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Sit down and write yourself a list of things that you feel are missing from your life. This could be anything from emotions to experiences, but you need a visual guide on what you hope to achieve for the next chapter. You have to be able to make your vision a reality, too, and a vision board could be everything to you to make your next step a successful one. Whether you have goals that are short term or long term, you should be thinking about achieving those goals as much as you can with the time that you have to do it.
If there’s one mistake that almost everyone makes in life, it’s forgetting that they are important. Yes, your partner and your children matter. They are very important people in your life and putting their needs first is almost second nature. The problem is that you forget yourself and your own needs, which can leave you feeling resentful, hurt and invisible.
Stop feeling invisible. You are powerful. You have a voice and it’s now that is your time to use it. 2019 is going to be your year because you are moving forward toward new things and new people. You have a life to live, and the only person who is going to live it with gusto is going to be you.
Wasting time feeling low isn’t going to give you the fulfilled existence that you deserve to have. You deserve to see a doctor, to get the help you need if you feel you need it. You deserve to find the career that will make you the happiest that you could be. You deserve to love and be loved, freely and without limitation, every single day that you are breathing. If you can see this, and understand this, then your 2019 is going to feel like an entirely new life for you.
Taking steps to live your best life cannot wait a second longer. Now is your time to take the reins in your life and lead yourself toward the life of positivity and happiness you’ve dreamed about. Take the ball drop at New Year and make a promise to yourself: 2019. The year of you.